Pot of Gold
Student drug dealer "Virgil" answers burning questions on life, stress and dealing pot
The phone rings constantly. Visitors arrive for short appointments at all hours. The schedule is grueling. But the money keeps pouring in. Green exchanged for green...
When did you start selling pot?
In the eighth grade. My brother smoked, and I would just steal what I thought was a fair amount and try to get as much money as I could for it.
How is life as a drug dealer?
Well, stressful man. Stressful. I’m constantly risking my freedom by giving others the chance to free their minds. It’s kind of funny when you think about it. I give people a chance to get high, to escape the day-to-day grind of life, and I’m the bad guy! What a joke.
Is the stress worth it?
Depending on how you look at it. Constantly looking over your shoulder and worrying that every knock on the door is a police officer, excuse me, I meant pig, instead, of the pizza I ordered 25 minutes earlier is a nasty way to live. But life would be a lot more stressful without the money I make. The bills don’t stop coming and, lucky for me, my clients never do either.
So I'm assuming you are pulling in some good money?
Yes. Both my car and tuition are paid for by selling pot. I guess marijuana is good for your brain.
Debatable. But why don't you just avoid all the stress and get a job to pay for all of your expenses?
Ha. A job. You must be referring to the act of slaving yourself for $6.50 an hour and still coming up way short at the end of the month. No. No thanks, I think I’ll stay outside the lines and live life the way it’s meant to be lived.
But what you are doing is illegal. Do you feel any remorse?
For what? I’m not hurting anyone. I’m selling pot. Look at Merck and Pfizer. Those “American capitalists” are deranging people’s minds everyday by getting them hooked on “legal drugs.” The drugs they produce are not only synthetic mind-fucks, but they are addicting as well. Keep ‘em coming back for more. Quite American. Tell me pot is addicting and I’ll stop selling, right now.
What about the anti-marijuana PSA-type commercials that have become popular?
You mean the commercials that say that smoking pot will motivate you to shoot your best friend in the head, or something ridiculous like that? If I saw a gun while I was high, I would piss myself. Who wants to see a gun when they’re stoned? It’s a bunch of B.S. propaganda. I think we have a lot of B.S. propaganda that we identify as such. I don’t think we need to treat this shit any different.